Saving My Life

One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around you

kept shouting

their bad advice--

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug

at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"

each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried

with its stiff fingers

at the very foundations,

though their melancholy

was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen

branches and stones.

But little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn

through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice

which you slowly

recognized as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do--

determined to save

the only life you could save.

- The Journey by Mary Oliver

Backbone Forming

I have been wanting to post a reflection for some time now but kept putting it off because I was not given the words to name and claim my experience. It was also because of some hesitancy on my part. You see I've largely been a passive person in life and this has often kept me from living from the depths of my heart.

And so a big part of what has happened to me (and is continuing to happen to me) during my time thus far at Wilderness Awareness School is that I am becoming a more assertive person and my fear of what other people might think is taking more and more of a back seat to honesty... with myself and with others. So in terms of the next post, I will be forthcoming in my reflections and really try to name my experience.

The other thing that it will likely do is confuse or fluster those folks who have a strong Christian worldview, which is more than okay with me at this point, as I have watered down my experience thus far by trying to pander my language to make it user-friendly to Christians. That being said, it is important to remember that I've not given up on the church, I've just walked away from it for a time (think John the Baptist). I've often wondered how many prophetic voices we aren't hearing because they aren't in the church. And maybe that is where I'll find my voice...

Awakening Old Powers Within

Bird Language is one of the 6 core studies that we are learning at Wilderness Awareness School.

Where You Are

A poem that was read to us during our orienteering class.
It is entitled "Lost" by David Wagoner

Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.
The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
No two trees are the same to Raven.
No two branches are the same to Wren.
If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.