My Art

I've been thinking about how I might incorporate two arts that I am developing. Flint knapping and wood carving. I thought how cool would it be for me to make primitive knives by flint knapping the blade and making wooden handles that I then carve designs into.

Here's a cool video of flint knapping a knife that you can check out. My idea is related to this except the handle would have designs similar to this or nature/landscape carvings in the handle.

Vision not Resolution

I have chosen not to do any New Year's Resolutions. I do have some things that I am going to place more emphasis on in my life but no resolutions. (Think about it re-solution. What are you doing? Nothing more than trying another way to solve the same problems that has been plaguing you for years.)

I read Tom Brown Jr's (Tracker School Founder) Newsletter and he offered this bit of wisdom:

I recommend that you don't make any of the typical New Year’s resolutions that most people forget about within a few days. I do recommend that you take a few hours or a day to sit alone in the bush and think deeply and clearly about your path in life, the things you are passionate about, and your Vision.

A Boy and His Dog (pt. 2)

Four months ago, I blogged about our new dog. Muffin was an older dog and we found out that she had some sort of stomach/intestinal cancer and was with us for only 10 weeks. So we decided with our Christmas money that we would get another dog, this time a much younger one.

We brought home Jasper yesterday from a local humane shelter. He is a year and a half old beagle (25 lbs.) with lots of energy and curiosity. His nose has been in everything around here not to mention marking his territory in and outside the house. He seemed to be really anxious at the shelter but in the near 24 hours he's been home he has adjusted quite well.

I can't wait for the weather to break this spring so that we can spend more time outside playing and tracking!!

Silent Night

I heard this song on previews of ER a few weeks back and loved the arrangement. There's just a haunting ambiance about this version that is heavenly. I've been following Pricilla Ahn's music for almost a year as she has toured with other Hotel Cafe group musicians that I love (i.e. William Fitzsimmons, Cary Brothers, Jay Bush).

Books = Emphasis?

It's a funny thing that has happened the past few Christmases. I tend to view the books I get from family and friends as a new focus for the coming year. Confused? Let me clarify.

A few years back, I got mostly theology, biblical studies and spirituality books for Christmas and the next year seemed to focus more on those items.

Two years ago, I got books that mostly dealt with wilderness survival, rites of passage and vision quest. And that year I ended up going to Tracker School and prepping myself for my vision quest (which I have yet to take) all the while immersing myself in initiation rites.

Last year, I got books related to nature education and found myself working at a camp as a naturalist teaching nature education and starting programs that are enriching my knowledge and desire for teaching.

This Christmas, I got books mostly relating to nature and the soul... so I wonder (if the pattern remains true) what my emphasis and priorities will be this year?

What I'm Doing

I said that I am now going to focus my efforts and energy on the outdoor education/ministry and wilderness living skills. Here are some of the things that I am working on:

- sent an application to an outdoor education program affiliate to be an instructor (waiting to hear back)
- applying for a (CoB) church camp manager/director position
- contacted two local park districts with proposals for wilderness skills workshops
- will be a wilderness resource person for two camps this summer (one in IL & one in IN)
- forming a men's community this spring for men to gather for sharing, worship, rewilding etc.. in a camp or state park setting
- starting the Kamana program and using Coyote's Guide as additional resource material
- considering furthering my certification to teaching in an outdoor education environment or more Tracker School courses
- thinking about when to go on my Vision Quest and do a sweat lodge

Beard of the Week

If you are in any ways interested in how I want my beard to look... this would be it! Not a big fan of long beards per say but full beards... most definitely.

(Thanks to Paul for his magnificent beard from beards.org)

Managaing Life (and Faith?)

There are lots of folks I know who are really good organizers and managers of their life. In fact, they spend A LOT of their time managing and keeping things in order. It really is built into our culture to be that way. Honestly, it's not all bad. For me, it depends on what I am managing and organizing as too how much time and effort I put into it.

I am discovering however, that many people take the same approach to their spiritual lives as well and quite simply it becomes profane, in my opinion. I've tried to control and influence my spiritual life for years and it wasn't until I learned to let go, did it begin to create something anew in me.

We were taught at Tracker School to wander without time, destination or expectation. Meaning that if you decide to go for a walk in the woods, don't plan to be there a certain amount of time or hope to see a certain thing or expect to arrive at a certain destination. When we do so we manipulate the circumstances and it becomes nothing more than a task. And we wonder why we don't experience nature anymore.

I use that illustration because it has a parallel in our spiritual life. For many, faith is something to be managed and organized into neat little compartments of their life and they only refer to it when the need arrives. When we approach faith like we do a hike in the woods we miss a lot! Only when we realize that we can't manage or place expectations on our faith do we truly begin to experience it in a way that renews our souls.

Maybe the challenge here is to approach your faith without time, destination or expectation.

Brethren 2.0

The Church of the Brethren has a new look!

Check out the new CoB website with a fresh look and a more user-friendly site (i.e. a welcome center that allows visitors to get all the info on us Brethren) by clicking here or on my favorite websites I read on the right side of my blog.

This One's for You Brad

More Zach Galifianakis humor.

46:16

Americans are working more and playing less. Read more here.

No wonder I am sensing a strong call to outdoor education. By playing we are learning, growing and dare I say it... working a little as well.

Trouble

I have always had a fascination with John the Baptist. There are some parallels in my own life and faith journey that allows me to have a spiritual kinship with John. Maybe this also explains why I am where I am in the church today... (sigh)

In my devotional time today, the author makes these statements regarding the person of John.

Always pointing beyond himself, ready to get out of the way, finally beheaded by the powers that be, John represents the kind of liberation and the kind of prophecy that we need in our affluent culture. He is not just free from the system, he is amazingly free from himself. These are the only prophets God can use, the only prophets we can trust... Trouble us, John!

The wilderness/desert has taught me more (in the 18 months) than the 28 years I've been in the church. I am not one to make the statement that I am a prophet. I do believe a lot of what I've been thinking/feeling and saying has had prophetic meaning. And I know it is troubling people in this affluent culture. People in the church aren't ready for that kind of message... they have their Joel Olsteens and Prayer of Jabezes... We aren't free from the system. Hell, we still aren't free from ourselves.

I guess writer Flannery O'Connor said it best of our present circumstances:

Truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.

Grand Canyon Adventure

I meant to post this when I got back from our trip in Indiana. I saw an ad in my Outside magazine for the movie Grand Canyon Adventure:River at Risk and wanted to see it. So when we were walking the canal in Indy, we passed the IMAX Theater and I saw that this movie was playing! I went the very next day and it was one of the coolest movie experiences I've ever had. It was in a 3D IMAX format. A full-on sensory overload with an important conservation message as well! Check out the trailer.

Direction and Inspiration

It has been really neat to see how things are coming into focus for me in the past few days.

I mailed out an application and resume today to an emerging outdoor education program. This just might be my opportunity to do what I'm passionate about. Keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

In the past week, I have been writing new songs and rerecording older ones. I have uploaded (much better) versions of my original songs "Fly", "Harvest", "Campfire" and a brand new one called "Elders." You can check out the songs on my music websites:

http://www.myspace.com/randallwestfall
or
http://www.purevolume.com/westwardwolf

I plan to have one more song finished, recorded and uploaded by the end of the week (I think it might be the best one yet).

Keep 'em Entertained

I usually don't watch more than 4 or 5 hours of TV a week anymore and one day while flipping through channels saw this infomercial and had to comment on it. It is probably appropriate that since TV has become a god for us in America that it is only fitting to gather around the tube and listen to someone else read the bible for us! Let's just hope that the electricity doesn't go out or the DVD doesn't get scratched or we won't be able to hear or see the word of God. Pathetic people...

Sightings

I live in a very interesting part of the country. What I mean by that is there are a larger variety of mammals to be found out there than in the eastern part of the Midwest where I've lived (Ohio, Indiana). It has a lot to do with being so close to the Mississippi River and in a more northern part of the region as well. Some of the larger apex predators (notably bears, wolves and cougars) have been reported in this region (SW Wisconsin, NW Illinois, NE Iowa & SE Minnesota).

This summer I had the chance to do some really great tracking with the girls at Scout camp and kids at our local church camp. I want to share two stories of our tracking adventures.

I regularly took the girls out tracking in a nearby ravine that sloped down into a small brook. This was the perfect place to do some tracking because there is always more animal activity near a water source. They were really getting into it as we trailed a right dominate female coyote for a good 30 yards or so. Then I had a girl spot a circular compression shaped track (circular means cat family) that was about two inches by two inches. After taking a few minutes to locate the next set of tracks, we discovered that they were from a bobcat! I've never tracked a bobcat before so I was excited! We followed the tracks into the brush and another girl pointed out some markings on an eastern hemlock. Cats usually sharpen their claws on trees and I was certain that this bobcat had done just that. Now bobcats are more common and it shouldn't be a surprise to find their sign out here.

A cougar however, that is a different story!!

When I was at our church camp this summer, I also took the kids tracking. Again they really got into it once they learned some tricks like determining the sex, dominance of the animal by studying the track. It was there that I discovered another circular compression shape, only this time the track was almost twice the size of the bobcat track (3 1/2" x 4" - almost the size of the palm of my hand). Could it have been a really big bobcat or even a lynx (which has larger tracks than a bobcat)? Possibly, but my mind had already shifted to the next largest feline... the cougar.

When we got back, I asked the camp manager about bobcat sightings in the area. He said yes there had been. I then told him about the track that I came across and saw his eyes get big. I suggested "cougar?" He said that his wife had thought she spotted a cougar about a year or so back but wasn't entirely sure since she didn't get the best look at it.

I was at the camp this past weekend and the camp manager told me that a cougar had been spotted over in the neighboring county! You can click here to read other sightings of cougar in this area.

No doubt you've probably seen the news clip about the cougar in Chicago and even the coyote in Chicago. If not check them out!

Next Steps for Me?

Too Open?

After looking over the past few posts, I've come to the conclusion that maybe I have been keeping myself too open for possibilities. I've been so open that I have not been able to focus in and really work towards one thing for fear that I might be shutting out other possibilities.

So today I am staking my claim and focusing my efforts more on my knowledge and further developing my wilderness living skills & outdoor education.

I hope that by focusing my attention on the possibilities that present themselves right now I can get a better sense of direction for my life's vocation.

Old or New Paradigm? Or Both?

Thinking more about the new paradigm that I mentioned briefly in my previous post.

I was flipping back through some of my older "emergent" books recently and trying to get more of an idea of where I am in the midst of this whole modern/postmodern debate. It's important to note that the "new paradigm" isn't necessarily postmodernism but has elements of both periods.

I'll list the nutrients that are found in their respective "soils" that are the foundations for both Modern and Postmodern then list where I fall in relation to the soils. (Taken from Dan Kimball's book "The Emerging Church" pg. 61)

Modern Soil: monotheism, rational, religion, propositional, systemic, local, individualistic, truth
Postmodern Soil: pluralism, experiential, mystical, narrative, fluid, global, communal/tribal, preference

My Soil: monotheism, experiential, mystical, narrative, fluid, local, communal/tribal, truth

I am approximately 2/3 postmodern and 1/3 modern. I'll expound a bit on why I am where I am. Growing up, my experience was profoundly rooted in a monotheistic tradition and though I am accepting of a pluralistic thought I find that my rooted-ness comes back to a simple understanding of a trinitarian God. I place a greater emphasis on the experiential methods of learning and find that it offers me more insight than a rational/logical approach. If there was ever a category that I feel most "at home" it would be that of a mystic! Narratives, anecdotes and storytelling makes things more palatable for me. I despise the systemic "whole is greater than the sum of its parts" thought. I believe that often the sums of its parts must have fluidity to make the argument of the "whole" even a possibility. The next nutrient of local/global really depends more on where I am at the present. I consider my thought to be more of a hybrid "glocal" but still focusing more on the good of the local community/tribe. I break with most post moderns as it relates to truth because I still believe in absolute and knowable truth.

Another term that has been used is ancient future and I would say that I am somewhere to be found in that term as well. Again, I have to ask myself if my place is still in the church. Honestly, if it wasn't for that 1/3 of modern thought still apart of who I am, I'd have probably left the church altogether. I can only imagine how frustrating it is for people ten years younger than me that have grown up in a predominate post-modern way of thinking.

Hope this gives some insight when I speak of the new paradigm that we are stepping into but not there yet. We are in a liminal space.

Wondering

For as much as I believe that I am called to be in the church (vocationally); I sometimes wonder if the church is really the best place for me? Two instances this past weekend that made me ponder these very things.

First, I spent a total of 4 hours on the road with another Brethren pastor who I had never met until I showed up at his church to catch a ride. We did as expected, spent most of our time talking about the state of the church as it related to our experiences. I've often wondered if people really get me because I am a pretty deep guy and have thought more than a time or two that people have just been tolerating me and my views because they don't want to discourage a young adult from ministry. I've even wondered if this was the reason my home church would keep re-licensing me to ministry, even if I was not representative of who they are. So I was elated to spend time with another pastor who in essence "got me" and shared our common experiences. I got to district conference feeling pretty good like "hey I just might fit in here."

Second. For the majority of the time that I was at conference, I sat in on business sessions and reports. There was one item of business that was pretty divisive among delegates and discussion for and against the lasted for nearly an hour. For the first time ever, I stood up to share on the item at hand. I quoted God's response to Job as a way of presenting (a prophetic?) an ambiguous argument for both sides of the issue. What I got was the sound of crickets and some heads shaking a visible "no." I sat down wondering if I had made the wisest choice... after all I usually don't make a statement in that environment unless I sense the Holy Spirit was encouraging me to do so. Then I started thinking... why did I make that statement? This was my first introduction into the district after all. Did I make it to be liked? Or did I make it to speak truth? I'm not entirely certain and only time will tell on that one.

It got me thinking though. I see the North American Church as clinging to the old paradigm and patterns of doing things. This way is failing and I cannot understand why the church insists on doing it this way. My other thought was "Am I still operating out of the old paradigm as well?" My sense is a strong NO. As I reflected back on the situation, my words may have been decidedly in a new paradigm way of thinking and that is why I got the response that I did. So I ask the question again, In my attempt to get people thinking in a new way am I being misunderstood? Maybe.

Is my vocational life best suited to be in the church or with one foot in and the other out (i.e. outdoor ministry, wilderness living education)? I've mentioned before that in some ways I feel like John the Baptist, returning to the church after having spent ( literally and metaphorically) time in the wilderness and bringing back to the church what the wilderness experience taught me.

This is part of the intentional discernment process that I am now in. Keep me in your prayers that this time of discernment would be fruitful.

Believe Again

Last night was the start of something new in my life. What was it?

Hope.

Until last night it was just another word thrown around in a political campaign, and honestly I'd become a little skeptical of that emotion. Today it has become embodied in my spirit. I feel like for the first time in my adult life I am able to really hope for a better tomorrow. That is something that I have not had in my 20's, which is supposed to be the most exciting time of your life. It hasn't been for me. I have had some amazing things happen to me along the way (most importantly a loving, supportive wife) and if it hadn't been for their intercessions, who knows where I'd be today.

My life had become a semblance of what the Architect in Matrix: Reloaded stated:

"Hope, the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength, and your greatest weakness."

Hope, as it seemed in my life was more of a weakness than a strength.

Now it is different. It feels different. This isn't about political parties, it's about believing in yourself and your country again. Honestly for the last 8 years, I have been ashamed of my country and didn't support it like I should have. But I am beginning to believe in the possibility of a new day for America.

I haven't felt like this in a long time and I pray that this good energy would spill out into all the other avenues of my life as well. I don't acknowledge what happened last night exclusively in a secular light, I know there are spiritual implications as well. And for that I am excited about what tomorrow holds.

Wolfman

I wanna be this guy...

New Favorite Comedian

Something about guys with beards!
I first saw this guy in the movie Out Cold. Since then I've kinda been following his career and rediscovered his comedy routine within the past 6 months. I think he's the funniest guy out there right now. Here's one of his funnier skits (mind you there is some nudity and language) still hilarious. Go to YouTube and type in Zach Galifianakis and watch all his funny videos... he has a dry sense of observational humor. I fell out of my chair laughing so hard at his comedy routines!

Scarecrow Game

I wanted to share a fun game that you can play with kids or even try yourself. It was one of the games that we didn't get to this past weekend at the Father/Son retreat.

As the temperatures are starting to fall there is a greater emphasis on staying warm. Ironically, we've been taught that the closer you keep your clothes to your body the warmer you'll be. However, the best way to stay warm is to create dead air space. You can best do this by taking some debris (dry leaves for the ground, fallen pine needles) and stuff them into your shirt. In doing so you allow air to move back and forth between two insulators; your shirt and your body. The air warms up and you are able to stay warmer rather than just piling on more layers of clothes. Make a game out of it to teach children the importance of battling hypothermia.

It's call the Scarecrow game. (Perfect for Halloween time)
First divide into teams. Then have the kids take off their shoestrings and tie them around the pant legs at the ankles. Have them tuck in their shirt and pull their hands into their shirt or coat. Then start piling in the leaves and debris giving the look of a stuffed scarecrow. The kids will have a ton of fun seeing who can get the most debris! Have prizes for added fun.

Most importantly, discuss how this simple knowledge can save thier life in a survival situation.

Cairn Terrier Breed

Thought I'd post a few vids about Cairn Terriers (the breed of our dog). I'm learning more and more about the breed when I get the chance.

One more video that tells a bit more about the breed.

Father/Son Reflections

As I looked out at the 28 men and boys that comprised Camp Mack's Father/Son Retreat, I instantly knew that the weekend was going to be a fulfilling one. Not just for the fathers and sons but for us staff as well.

I knew I wanted to take part in the weekend because it fused together the two things that I am most passionate about: wilderness living skills and masculine spirituality. Though I was teaching the wilderness skills, I was also aware of the intimate connection between man and nature and how he relates that connection to his son. In short, how he conveys the message of God's love through his love for nature.

Whether it was the debris hut being built or watching the father/son teams work at making and maintaining a fire in five minutes; I noticed the sense of shared responsibility. Often in our society today the father is the one to "do it" but that wasn't the case as I watched the fathers pull back and allow their sons not only to succeed but to fail as well and in the process learn the importance of perseverance.

I learned a lot from watching the fathers and the sons this past weekend. It makes me wish my dad and I had done something like that when I was a boy. I also heard time and time again how much they appreciated us teaching these primitive skills because they are quickly being forgotten in our high tech world today.

Belongings

I am now responsible for maintaining the A Place Apart blog. Today, I've posted a new devotional thought and question for discussion and reflection at the site. If you read my blog you might be interested in checking in on APA's blog, prayer resources and website. Look for a new question every Wednesday morning.

Green Hour

One of the best books I've ever read was Last Child in the Woods and there was an updated and expanded edition released this year. It included a list of things to do with children that weren't in my edition. Here are 13 things that you can do to get (your) children out into nature.

I particularly like the idea of a family "green hour" (number 7 on the list) together.

Westfall Wildlife Habitat

I've thought about making our backyard a Certified Wildlife Habitat. Turns out you can actually do this with the National Wildlife Federation.

All we need in our backyard is basics for animals food, water, cover and places to raise their young. We have 3 of the 4 right now... only need a water source and they list a birdbath as one possibility.

You even get a sign to place on the property.

New Music Site

MySpace has been screwing around with the Artists Pages and I have not been a happy camper with them of late. So I started an account with PureVolume this week and hope you'll check out my music over there for the time being until I figure out what's going on with my MySpace account.

I just uploaded newer (fuller) versions of Frontiers, Campfire and Wild Heart as well as a new one called Harvest. Click here to listen and bookmark it and let others know about it as well! Also I'm interested in feedback so you can leave it here, there or via email.

I have self-produced demo CD's for $5 as well if you are interested in more music.

Let me know what you think.

Facts from NCLI Video

- A study found that young people could identify 1000 corporate logos but fewer than 10 plants or animals native to their backyards.
- Children who learned in outdoor classrooms increased science scores by 27%.
- Children as young as five showed a decrease in ADD symptoms when they were engaged with nature.
- Children ages 6 to 11 spend thirty hours a week looking at a TV or computer monitor.
- 400% increase in childhood obesity since the 1960's.

Adressing Nature Deficit Disorder

I am surprised that I hadn't heard of this until just recently. If you google "No Child Left Inside" you'll see that a lot of states have this initiative that gets children outside for experiential, hands on learning in natural settings.

When the current administration started the No Child Left Behind initiative, I was one that said it was actually just as important (if not more) that physical education and natural education receive the same emphasis and it hasn't happened until recently. With childhood obesity and ADD on the rise in children today it is becoming more and more prudent that they have a balanced approach to their learning not just in the math and science realm.

The NCLI Coalition reports that the NCLI Act was passed in the House of Representatives on September 19th and is now in the Senate. It will probably be delayed due to the Bailout plan.

Click here to watch the NCLI video on YouTube.

New Releases

How cool is it when two of your favorite artists release new albums about the same time? Bebo Norman's new album came out last Tuesday and Andrew Peterson's new album hits stores Oct. 21st!

Click on the links to hear some of their new music... it's sweet

ZAP!

Found this on Jeremy's Blog A Moving Meditation and couldn't pass up the chance to share it! This is classic Christian synth rock from the 80's? For all you Brethren folk out there this looks like The Gospel Echoes Teams daytrippin'. I swear that the bass player/singer looks just like one of my Old German Baptist Brethren cousins! It might be the best video ever.

Male Call

Came across some funny old Murphy Brown episodes. This one is called "Male Call" and it takes a light-hearted but insightful look into a big thing that was happening at that time, the mythopoetic men's movement. It gives a small glimpse into the kind of work that I want to do. Though the group work is only one of the many aspects to the work. The episode is broken into two videos. Enjoy!

Podcast in Sidebar Now

I added another post on my podcast talking about the rewilding process as it relates to the English language. You can listen to it by clicking on the play button the right side of the blog just underneath my profile. You can also access earlier casts by clicking on the posts button on the player. Check it out and let me know what you think.

Paying Respects to the Great Mysteries

I don't really follow UFC or MMA for that matter. I have seen a fight or two (mostly because of friends' interest) and I understand why it is such a popular sport at this moment.

I saw in the news that an Ex-UFC champ died at the age of 37. After reading the article, it was fascinating how this guy embodied a lot of the things that I ascribe to. Evan Tanner was a wandering spirit and outdoorsman who undertook a journey to "cleanse" himself and conduct his own "Survivorman" experiment, which was nothing new for him. He was found dead yesterday in the California desert. This was what he had told friends on his blog:

This isn’t a version of ‘Into the Wild, I’m not going out into the desert with a pair of shorts and a bowie knife, to try to live off the land. I’m going fully geared up, and I’m planning on having some fun. I’m not just going out into the desert, I’m going out into the desert to hunt for lost treasure, I’m going on a pilgrimage of sorts, a journey to solitude, to do some thinking, and to pay my respects to the great mysteries.

I find it interesting that the longing to connect with something greater in a wilderness/desert setting isn't just coming to the surface in the church but also in our society.

More in Common than Football

A few of you know that I went to high school with Matt Light who is the left tackle for the New England Patriots. I even had his mother as a music teacher during elementary school.

Matt has a foundation that works to empower young people. Click here to check it out.

The foundation has put together a film called Stands Alone Warrior that takes 4 young men from an East Coast urban setting and 4 young men from a Cheyenne Indian Reservation and places them in an outdoor setting in Montana to work on their development as men. It looks rather interesting and one to check out if you are interested in initiation practices and masculine spirituality.

You can watch the trailer below.

Bill Maher Documentary

Getting Roles Reversed

I saw an article on Yahoo this morning that said what I've been thinking for some time now. After hearing Gov. Palin last night (and not being impressed) the article talks about how she sees what we're doing in Iraq as "a task from God."

The quote comes from a spokesman from Americans United for Separation of Church and State:

I miss the days when pastors delivered sermons and politicians delivered political speeches," he said. "The United States is increasingly diverse religiously. The job of a president is to unify all those different people and bring them together around policy goals, not to act as a kind of national pastor and bring people to God.

I agree wholeheartedly and it looks as though Gov. Palin is continuing that line of thinking that we've seen in the Bush Administration.

A Boy and his Dog

As of Sunday evening we now have a dog. She is a 9 year old Cairn Terrier named Muffin. She has been nothing but a good girl since we got her.

The back story for this event.

My wife and I have been looking for a dog ever since we moved out to Illinois. I am a fan of Huskies/Malamutes, German Shepherds, Beagles and Schnauzers. My wife is a huge Labrador Retriever, Dachshund, Jack Russells and Pug lover. We couldn't settle on what kind of dog we wanted and had some potentials not come thru.

We found out about Muffin thru some friends whose Uncle was going to be moving into a retirement community and couldn't keep her. The offer was there we just weren't sure.

Saturday afternoon I had a revelation. I had a dog growing up named Buttons and he was a mix of Lhasa Apso and terrier. We never knew exactly what kind of terrier until then. When our friend said Cairn Terrier I wasn't certain what the breed looked like so I googled it and I found Buttons!

The numbers game: We got Buttons in 1988 and had to get rid of him in 1999 when my folks divorced so he was 11 years old. I have not had a dog since then... 9 years. Muffin was born about the same time as we gave Buttons away and she looks just like him (especially in the face).

The revelation was this: you have a chance to finish with Muffin what you didn't with Buttons. The process feels like a continuation... and my wife and I will love Muffin for the rest of her life (be it a year from now or 6 years).

Shouldn't He Be Home By Now?

I occasionally use a homemade tracking stick when I track. I don't use it often cuz I feel like it becomes a crutch now that my skills are increasing. While doing some research on various stick designs I found a website that promotes Trackstick.

For all the techies out there, your sure to rush out and buy this thing. As for me, it is just another attempt to let technology think for us. I despise these GPS's that folks think they have to have and now this Trackstick will give parents who don't trust their children and spouses who suspect infidelity the opportunity to "track" them. Don't believe me? Then just check out some of the videos on the Trackstick site.

Privacy issues or trustworthy issues?

Another Inconvenient Truth

Nearly There

I am 90% finished with my letter to men in local CoB's. I'm believing more and more that the time is right for a gathering such as this. I hope to have it mailed by the beginning of next week. I opened the letter with this thought:

It has been my experience that the many facets of the North American Church has often left men wanting not something more rather something else.

Preseason #2

My Buckeyes are #2 in the preseason polls right behind Georgia. USC comes in ranked #3 which makes the Sept. 13th match up in Los Angelos the early season national championship game! Ohio State returns 20 starters to their team that went to their second national championship game the previous two seasons. The tough games on the schedule: #3 USC, #13 Wisconsin, #22 Penn State, #20 Illinois and as always Michigan. I have a feeling this is going to be another great year in college football and for my Buckeyes!

Go Bucks!!!!

Insightful One-liners

Emergent Brethren is one of the blogs I read and a recent post had some insightful quotes that made me think about my life's direction and purpose.

"Quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death."
"Stop repeating the past and start creating the future."
"Stop playing not to lose and start playing to win."
"Quit putting eight foot ceilings on what God can do."

And my personal favorite...
"Go after a dream that is destined to fail without divine intervention."

Tracker Interview

The interviewer isn't the most entertaining but here are some good videos of Tom Brown Jr. talking about all the things that one would learn at his Tracker School. This just skims the surface... if you want to go deeper take the Standard class.

Video 1


Video 2


Video 3

Two Rants... Actually One

This afternoon as we were doing dishes, my wife had a Christian radio station playing in the background. Now my wife still enjoys listening to CCM. I on the other hand have pretty much been off the bandwagon for about 5 years. I still have my select few that I buy their music, I would mention that of the 5 artists only 1 is really considered a big artist in CCM. Other than that, I really tend to avoid CCM, mostly because it has just become another form of pop music... which I despise.

As the radio was playing, the station mentioned about how they had become apart of the Family Life Radio Network(?) and the language was revolving totally around family friendliness. It got me thinking about a message that I heard about 6 years ago. It was mentioned in the message that we (North American Church) have a nostalgia for the 1950's church and even 1950's family life. In short, 1950's church and family has nothing to do with the kingdom of God. Community in Jesus Christ has everything to do with the kingdom of God. I don't expect the ardent CCMers to understand this point at all... they are too immersed in it.

Lastly, I am growing more concerned that the modern church is more concerned with worshiping Jesus (he doesn't mention once) than following him (which he does mention 27 times if my count is right). Think about that...

More Photos - Summer '08

On the shores of the Jamestown Settlement

Reconstructed barracks in the Fort.

Finally swam in the Atlantic Ocean!

Cleaning out the gutters on our house.

Shirt made out of Fender guitar pics.
Ripley's Believe It Or Not Museaum, Williamsburg, VA.

A photo montage Summer '08

Worshipping with over 5,000 Brethren in Richmond, VA.

My office for the summer: Nature Tent @ Camp Far Horizons.

Teaching girls how to track!

Is that a bobcat track?

Colonial Williamsburg Church, Williamsburg, VA.

Fear Itself

Most of you know that I'm a avid fan of suspense/thriller/horror novels and movies. I had heard of the new NBC series called Fear Itself but had not seen any episodes. Until last night.

Last night's episode was called Skin and Bones and it was quite possibly the scariest movie/show I've seen in quite some time. On network television nonetheless! Good storytelling. Click here to watch the full episode or go to NBC.com

I don't watch much TV but this series (if the network decides to keep it) might be one that I tune into more often. Think I might start spending some more time working on my novel! Got the creative juices flowing again.

Grateful

I am grateful for two events that happened today.

First, I spent some time with a good friend that I hadn't seen since college. We spent the better part of 3 hours sharing a great meal and catching up on life and where we sense God is leading our respective journeys. It was just good time with a brother that has the gift of encouragement and was supportive and excited about my passion for fusing my wilderness skills and masculine spirituality passions. Time seemed to stand still... I thank God for that.

Second, I just got off the phone with a mentor and friend that I hadn't spoken to in about a year or so. It was so refreshing to share with one another the joys and struggles that we observe with the church, faith and life. In short to say with one another... "we don't know" and to know that is okay. We were both able to acknowledge, as Richard Rohr says, our ability to live our lives in liminal space. It was good to hear from him about where A Place Apart is at this moment and what it is yet to be.

I thank God for the ways that my life is interconnected to gracious, honest and raw people of faith.

Influence

Been listening to way too much Steven Delopoulos lately. Even some of my music has taken a Delopolous-like turn. Fun Stuff. Check out his MySpace Page... my favorite is the song "Seasons"

Later OGBB

I've not asked my Grandpa about the Old German Baptist Brethren's Annual Meeting and if a decision had been reached regarding the use of the Internet but if the shutting down of the OGBB Blogring is any indication, then I suppose I need not ask him.

Too Good Not to Pass On

A quote that is quickly moving up on my top ten list of all-time quotes. It comes from Don Jones' book Wisdom for the Journey

A man must be feminine enough to find his soul,
and masculine enough to find his balls.

Unique Treasure Soon to be at your Fingertips

The oldest surviving copy of the New Testament, a 4th century version that had its Gospels and epistles spread across the world, is being made whole again — online. Read more about it here.

Men Need More

I've been thinking about starting something new out here in Illinois.

...been thinking about how I might fuse my passions of wilderness living skills and masculine spirituality, right here and right now... not off in some distant future that will only keep me wondering what if? I am presently beginning to work on a letter that I will submit to local Brethren congregations inviting those men both active and inactive out into the wilderness to seek how we might come alive again.

Don't want to give too much away but I'm excited about what might be and trusting God to lead the process!

Wolves Under Protection Again

A judge in Montana declared Friday that gray wolves be placed back under endangered species protection! Read more here

Been Too Long

Yesterday was the first sermon I've preached in almost 2 years! I thought it went alright and the content challenged the congregation to think about where they might have lost Jesus and how they can fall in love all over again. Here's a quick highlight from my message:

Wilderness represents mystery. It represents the unknown... faith. Sadly enough the word faith has come to mean the opposite today from its intended use. When I use the word faith, I think of Hebrews 11: faith=things not yet seen. Today faith seems to be more about answers, clarity, solutions. We even go so far as to say that Jesus is the answer. Done. Figured out. Checked off the list. I don't want that Jesus. We aren't even comfortable seeing Jesus as a mystery anymore, a mystery that we continually fall in love with.

Being Hospitable

Though the Village of Lena may not necessarily agree. I purposely let my grass grow a bit taller than the yards around us. By a bit I mean 2 inches. On my days off it has been interesting to watch how much more animal activity we seem to have than any of the other yards. Aside from the squirrels and hundreds of various birds, I've seen rabbits, raccoons, weasel tracks and a groundhog in the back yard.

Just yesterday we saw a rabbit that has a warren right next to the house and she had come to nurse her young babies. Amazingly, Brenda had just done some weeding the day before in that very spot and did not see the warren or burrow. I too had this sense about not mowing that area at all, had I done so I would have probably killed about 3 or 4 babies! It just makes me wonder about receptivity. I think by purposely allowing our yard to be a little more hospitable to animals we are seeing more than our neighbors.

The picture below was one of the better pics we were able to take while the mother was nursing her young.

Princesses Tracking

Last week was an interesting week because one of the three camps that was at Far Horizons was a Pampered Princess camp. I didn't get it at all. These girls were there to be pampered (spa treatments, manicures, pedicures, facials etc..) all that feminine crap. Why did they sign up for a camp that was out in the middle of the woods? Some were complaining because they thought that they were going to be staying in a motel not in cabins with but, spiders and bats! This was the group that had lots of issues (homesick, ecophobia etc..). I found myself not even paying much attention to that group.

Until...

I had the luxury of being one of the few staff old enough to drive the vans so I was stuck with taking these pampered princesses to Galena for an off camp activity. They went to a bath and body kind of place for more manicures, massages, fingernail painting and coloring a rubber duck. I, on the other hand, sat in a chair in the corner plotting my revenge since they had me for a nature session later on that afternoon!

I wondered if these girls would even give a rip about the nature stuff at all? So when the time came for me to teach them about tracking, fox walking and other wilderness skills, I was shocked at exactly how interested they were! They really got into the tracking and wasn't even afraid to get a little dirty. So it ended up being a good experience for them and I'm glad I didn't just pass on that particular camp otherwise they and I would have missed out on a great learning experience.

At the campfire that night, all three camps were interested in how I got the fire going as well as asking more questions about fox walking or tracks that they had seen around camp.

Just goes to show that you can't judge a book by its cover or a girl by how "pampered" she is.

RIP George

I saw that George Carlin passed away yesterday from heart failure. I loved his sense of play on words, ideology and social commentary. Even though I didn't always agree with him on certain issues, I always appreciated what he brought to the conversation. Here is one of my favorite (non-vulgar) rants from George:

What They'll Remember

I just got back from an exciting week at Camp Emmaus. I was a counselor for 3rd and 4th graders as well as helping to teach nature stuff to them. These kids couldn't get enough of me teaching them tracking, fox walking, wide-angle vision and much more pertaining to the natural world. At our closing circle, when the kids were asked about what they liked and will remember about camp; more than half the kids talked about tracking, fox walking etc...

I was blown away!

I didn't know if these kids would really get some of the things that I'd learned at Tracker School but they just ate it up! I was talking to one of the camp board members and mentioned the possibility of doing a wilderness camp next year, one for elementary kids and one for high school youth. She was instantly excited about those ideas and asked me to submit a summary for those camps at the next camp board meeting in July!

Some good things are happening here in Illinois and I saw this as an opportunity to test some of the things I would be teaching the girl scouts this coming week as well. Maybe this is part of what I'm supposed to be doing... helping others to be more connected to the earth and ultimately to the Creator.

This looks to be a very good summer, if the past two and a half weeks have been any indication. Trust me, you'll be hearing much more to come.

Where the action is

I joined facebook today and will probably close out my personal myspace account since nothing really happens there. I will keep my myspace music page though. Seems to me I know more people who are on facebook and they are more active than myspace as well.

Severe Weather

This picture was taken by my wife about 7:30 last night as we drove back home from Indiana. It was some of the darkest clouds I've ever seen. We had some severe weather last night and into the morning here in NW Illinois and SW Wisconsin.

A New Venture... New Name

Tomorrow I start working with the Girl Scouts Camp in this area as a naturalist. Ever since returning from Tracker School last September, I thought that I might enjoy working in nature education. I am slightly nervous about what I have to offer but excited about the possibilities of passing on knowledge about our natural world. The irony in the whole matter is that I am strongly interested in male spirituality and find it humorous that I will be the only male at camp this summer!

I was informed that we do not go by our real names at camp, rather by a nickname, so you can guess who I'll be addressed as this summer... Wolf.

Makes me think of Vision Quest, where you are given a new spirit name or Rev. 2:17.

Nostalgia. Grief. Hope.

There was an interesting reflection in this month's Messenger by Guy Wampler. The reflection dealt with how we tend to favor nostalgia instead of grieving about a particular era gone by. He notes that "Saying goodbye to that which is past makes room for something new to happen. Grief while painful, has the potential of becoming more liberating." And he invites the reader to move beyond the notion of nostalgia which (I believe) elicits worry about the present circumstances with this great little quip "Worry will not free tomorrow of its troubles; it only robs today of its strength."

The reflection spoke to me because I tend to be a nostalgic person. I often long for the "way it used to be" and I'm in my late 20's! Maybe its because I have this idealistic notion of how when we had to work harder at something it required a bit more intentionality than we give to things nowadays. I would say that the reason I tend to be nostalgic is because I seek to discover how we might return to that way of intentionality only knowing more because of of our hindsight.

Then Guy goes on to say "Nostalgia is to romanticize the past and to long to recover it. Grief is to mourn the loss of that which was once cherished, but to let it go and allow something new to come into being."

Maybe I should learn to treat those moments of nostalgia much more like I do when I grieve the loss of my mother. It is easy to remember the good times and love that she shared with us while she was on this earth... but instead 0f getting caught up in that emotion, I think about how she continues to live in me and the things I say and do in the smallest of ways points to her life and her influence on me.

I need to be less nostalgic... only then can I begin to hope. Hope that my life does reflect what my mother taught me. Hope that for such a time as this, God is doing something new and wonderful in my life and in the church. After all, why should I think about the "good 'ol days" then and miss the goodness of this day!

If only a little room

From a letter written by J. Heinrich Arnold:

I thank God that you feel an inkling of the reality of Jesus in your life.
Nourish this small flame and let it grow. Jesus can come into your heart only
insofar as it is emptied of other things. If a bucket of water is full, you
cannot add to it; but if it is emptied, it can be refilled. You must become
empty. Jesus will touch you even if there is only little room for him.

A simple reminder of how we must constantly empty our hearts and minds of things that keep us from living an abundant life in Christ.

Seeing Beneath

Holy mystery
beyond defining,
Open me to the mystery,
To see beneath the surface,
To live within your depths.

From the Prayer for the Mystic- A Place Apart Fully Alive Training Manual

This is a prayer from A Place Apart that has been like the Jesus Prayer for me of late. It is especially fascinating to be praying this prayer as I begin to work on the compost pile and work with the land around our house. To see what lies beneath my work and the soil... I thank God for the revelations that occur as you go about working/praying.

Chuck Noland Revisited

A French explorer and adventurer will spend 300 days living like "Robinson Crusoe" on a South Pacific island where his only luggage will be a Swiss army knife, machete video camera and a solar panel for charging the camera. Reminds me a bit of Tam Hanks' movie Cast Away. I'd love to conduct the same experiment/experience!

The Westfall Botanical Conservatory

In my previous post I put up a picture of what our backyard looks like. In some ways it has its own unique ecology. Most people would see nothing but exotic species and weeds therefore would immediately pull out the mower and cut it down to get that turf look. Not me. I am excited about the different possibilities for the backyard. I see a spot where a park bench could go and create a botanical conservatory feel. I see where my hammock will be tied between two white pines. There is a box that is perfect for starting a compost pile so we can help regrow areas of dry, dead grass as well as be ready to start planting a garden next year. I can't wait to start making teas using pine needles and sumac or find uses for the many dandelions (I'm thinking maybe dandelion wine). Lots of tree pruning will help maintain the trees as well. This will take some work but I look forward to what lies ahead.

Of all the areas of wilderness survival, I believe that plant identification and knowledge is my weak spot. So I look forward to the challenge! I welcome the morning glories, chives, sumacs, poppies as well as the poison oak. I see it as a valuable learning experience. It is great to finally have that small area of land in which you can do something with instead of being cooped up in an apartment with no land with which to work.

Our New Home

Front of the House

Back Yard

Of things to come...

David Whyte is emerging as my favorite poet and his poem entitled "Everything is Waiting for You" from the book by the same name has conjured up images of the newness of life as we settle into northwestern Illinois. Enjoy!

Your great mistake is to act the drama
as if you were alone. As if life
were a progressive and cunning crime
with no witness to the tiny hidden
transgressions. To feel abandoned is to deny
the intimacy of your surroundings. Surely,
even you, at times, have felt the grand array;
the swelling presence, and the chorus, crowding
out your solo voice. You must note
the way the soap dish enables you,
or the window latch grants you freedom.
Alertness is the hidden discipline of familiarity.
The stairs are your mentor of things
to come, the doors have always been there
to frighten you and invite you,
and the tiny speaker in the phone
is your dream-ladder to divinity.

Put down the weight of your aloneness and ease into
the conversation. The kettle is singing
even as it pours you a drink, the cooking pots
have left their arrogant aloofness and
seen the good in you at last. All the birds
and creatures of the world are unutterably
themselves. Everything is waiting for you.

'Anyul Meetin'

I spent some time a week ago just north of North Manchester at the Eel River District of the Old German Baptist Brethren. It was nice to be back in a worship setting that in some ways I grew up in and even make some connections from my time as a pastor in the North Manchester area as well as my family ties (my mother's side of the family is OGBB). It is funny how most of the "members" warmed up to me once the family connections were made. Like I've mentioned before I grew up with one foot in the Church of the Brethren and the other in the OGBB. I think it is easy for me to romanticize about what it would be like to become a member but know that is not where my truest sense of identity lies.

I'm blogging because they are now in the middle of their Annual Meeting taking place this year in Lawrence, Kansas. The Dunker Journal has posted some links to the local paper out there with photos of the OGBB preparing for Annual Meeting you can view them by clicking here. Updates can be found here and here.

At Your Fingertips

I get daily emails from jillianmichaels.com and this week she had a simple yet great way to measure proper portions for a meal. Most of us struggle with what constitutes as an actual portion without measuring and counting calories. Here's what Jillian suggests:

The Hand Method
Size of your fist - cereal, rice, beans, veggies (approx. 1 cup)
Center of your palm (to the base of your fingers) - meat, poultry, fish (approx. 3-5 oz.)
Thumb size - cheese or condiments (approx. 1-2 oz.)
Drink 1 - 8 oz. class of water

I have been working out for almost 6 months and have noticed some changes in my muscle mass but I have continued to struggle with food. I am going to incorporate this smaller portion into my own lifestyle in order to get more in line with the lifestyle that I am longing to reach. I can probably state that I am a "fit but fat man" and now need to really work on my goals for eating right.

Self-Sustainable Life

In just the past week and a half I have heard the language "global food crisis" uttered more than a few times. I know that part of this may be an attempt to get us worrying about food prices thus encouraging us to spend more since supply might become more and more limited. I find it interesting that our government provokes us with fear in order to get us to spend more money, in this case on food. I'm reminded of an ancient Hopi prophecy that speaks to our current circumstances in America and around the world. It comes from the book The Hopi Survival Kit by Thomas E. Mails:

Industrialized nations will become careless in getting more the resources out of the earth. Believing all these things will last forever, soon natural resources will be depleted. Fuel shortages will occur; industrial machinery will come to a standstill. The machinery used for planting, harvesting and transport will become useless. Supermarket shelves will become empty of farm produce. The farmers and those who grow their own food will not sell their produce. Money will become worthless. The white man with all his intelligence and technology will not be able to repair the damage. We will see extraordinary events in Nature and Earth, including humans.

This has also got me thinking more about living a self-sustainable life. My wife and I are interested in having a small organic farm at some point in the near future. By small organic farm, I mean having a few chickens and goats as well as a diverse garden for our use. If we could produce even 50% of our food then I think that would be a great goal to work towards.

I wonder how many other folks are thinking the same way as we are. Keep in mind we have been thinking about this for years not just as a reaction to the "global food crisis" though it certainly speeds up the possibility of that happening.

I actually have this vision of me spending my days working in the garden, on the farm and in my workshop building projects for my family as well as others. I believe that I am at a point in my life where I long for simplicity and sustainability.

Civilized Animals

Another story that I should have included in my earlier post about the way we walk. One question: When did human evolve from being more than animals?

The "Barefoot Bard" brings this basic hostility to a healthy human gait into clearer focus, as he describes the concern his walking left among friends and family, and one friend in particular who put that concern in very blunt and honest terms.

One of these concerned friends, a religious man, joined me in [the] forest for a walk. On the trail, he was in his boots, I was on my soles. He began to share his concerns about me. He remarked that I was "walking like an animal." Yes, he said, "You walk like a animal!" I stopped in my tracks.

He went on about how, "walking on your paws, is the way an animal walks, savages walk, primitives walk and we are no longer animals. We are highly evolved beings. We are civilized beings!" He walked along side me, landing on his heels, pounding on the path, stepping on a banana slugs, stomping on plants. The more he preached his concerns and marched on the path, the more I could see the difference in our walk. The less I trusted the talk, not him, but his talk. ...

Change Our Politics, Change America

My wife and I just got back from casting our early primary vote here in Indiana. The primary is on May 6th but she won't be here and I decided that since I was there to go ahead and vote as well. Right now, polls are indicating that Obama and Clinton are in a deadlock tie.

I am supporting Barack Obama because I believe that he can best lead the country from these past dismal years of the Bush administration. I personally only see Clinton continuing the Washington politics that we've come to know and despise. I could expound on other reasons for supporting Obama over Clinton but don't feel I need to wax politically on my blog... there are many other blogs to read if you want that. Simply put, for such a time as this, America needs such a leader!